The Borowitz Report

Filename: the-borowitz-report.pdf
ISBN: 9781439129494
Release Date: 2010-05-11
Number of pages: 112
Author: Andy Borowitz
Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Download and read online The Borowitz Report in PDF and EPUB Prepare to be shocked. From the man The Wall Street Journal hailed as a "Swiftean satirist" comes the most shocking book ever written! The Borowitz Report: The Big Book of Shockers, by award-winning fake journalist Andy Borowitz, contains page after page of "news stories" too hot, too controversial, too -- yes, shocking -- for the mainstream press to handle. Sample the groundbreaking reporting from the news organization whose motto is "Give us thirty minutes -- we'll waste it."


The Borowitz Report

Filename: the-borowitz-report.pdf
ISBN: 0743262778
Release Date: 2004-10-05
Number of pages: 112
Author: Andy Borowitz
Publisher: Simon & Schuster

Download and read online The Borowitz Report in PDF and EPUB Prepare to be shocked. From the man The Wall Street Journal hailed as a "Swiftean satirist" comes the most shocking book ever written! The Borowitz Report: The Big Book of Shockers, by award-winning fake journalist Andy Borowitz, contains page after page of "news stories" too hot, too controversial, too -- yes, shocking -- for the mainstream press to handle. Sample the groundbreaking reporting from the news organization whose motto is "Give us thirty minutes -- we'll waste it."


Who Moved My Soap

Filename: who-moved-my-soap.pdf
ISBN: 1439129738
Release Date: 2009-08-25
Number of pages: 96
Author: Andy Borowitz
Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Download and read online Who Moved My Soap in PDF and EPUB Attention, CEOs: Finally, a book you don't have to cook! If you're a CEO who's just been caught, this is the book you won't want to be caught without. Who Moved My Soap? The CEO's Guide to Surviving in Prison is loaded with helpful tips, including: • How to go from "bitch" to "boss" in one week or less • The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Prisoners • Complete prison-slang/corporate-speak glossary • Prison cell feng shui • How to avoid getting back-stabbed -- literally • The Zagat guide to fine prison dining


Governor Arnold

Filename: governor-arnold.pdf
ISBN: 9780743262668
Release Date: 2004-01-13
Number of pages: 120
Author: Andy Borowitz
Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Download and read online Governor Arnold in PDF and EPUB THE TERMINATOR'S TERM, TOTALLY RECALLED! The real story of Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger's first one hundred days in office comes to life in vivid two-color photographs and completely fictitious captions. Governor Arnold tells the story of Schwarzenegger's historic first days in office, in pictures that are evocative, dramatic, and sometimes truly frightening -- especially the ones in which he is wearing no shirt. New Yorker humorist Andy Borowitz, creator of the award-winning website BorowitzReport.com, travels to Sacramento for an up-close, exclusive look at a man with a mission: to reshape California in his own monstrous, bulging-veined image. It's a book for history buffs...about the buffest man in history! Governor Arnold is guaranteed to make the Governator stop groping women...and start groping for superlatives!


The Trillionaire Next Door

Filename: the-trillionaire-next-door.pdf
ISBN: 0066620767
Release Date: 2000-05-16
Number of pages: 112
Author: Andy Borowitz
Publisher: HarperBusiness

Download and read online The Trillionaire Next Door in PDF and EPUB When Getting Rich Quick Just Isn't Fast Enough!Many day trading books on the market today contain dubious advice, but never before has there been a book guaranteed to contain 100 percent dubious advice--until now. The Trillionaire Next Door is that book. Inside you'll find: The rock-solid, scientific principles of day trading explained in language so clear and concise it's almost insulting A glossary of key economic terms for the day trader, like "mousepad" and "click" Advice for the long-term investor: which stocks to hold in your portfolio for five, ten, fifteen minutes or more Confusing, meaningless graphs and charts Bad math And much, much more--but since day traders have short attention spans, not too much more "If The Trillionaire Next Door were a stock, I'd buy it, sell it, buy it, sell it, and buy it again--it's that good!" --Stacy Gellman, day trader


The 50 Funniest American Writers

Filename: the-50-funniest-american-writers.pdf
ISBN: 9781598531732
Release Date: 2011-10-13
Number of pages: 504
Author: Andy Borowitz
Publisher: Library of America

Download and read online The 50 Funniest American Writers in PDF and EPUB Ever wondered who makes a very funny person laugh? Wonder no more. Brought together in this Library of America collection are America’s fifty funniest writers—according to acclaimed writer and comedian Andy Borowitz. Reaching back to Mark Twain and forward to contemporary masters such as David Sedaris, Nora Ephron, Roy Blount Jr., Ian Frazier, Bernie Mac, Wanda Sykes, and George Saunders, The 50 Funniest American Writers* is an exclusive Who’s Who of the very best American comic writing. Here are Thurber and Perelman, Lenny Bruce and Bruce Jay Friedman, Garrison Keillor, Dave Barry, and Veronica Geng, plus hilarious lesser-known pieces from The New Yorker, Esquire, The Atlantic, National Lampoon, and The Onion. Who does “one of the funniest people in America” (CBS Sunday Morning) read when he needs a laugh?


The 50 Funniest American Writers

Filename: the-50-funniest-american-writers.pdf
ISBN: 1598531077
Release Date: 2011
Number of pages: 461
Author: Andy Borowitz
Publisher:

Download and read online The 50 Funniest American Writers in PDF and EPUB Reaching back to Mark Twain and forward to contemporary masters such as David Sedaris, Roy Blount, and Bernie Mac, this book is an exclusive collection of the very best American comic writing.


Holy Headshot

Filename: holy-headshot.pdf
ISBN: 9781439123164
Release Date: 2012-11-27
Number of pages: 240
Author: Patrick Borelli
Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Download and read online Holy Headshot in PDF and EPUB Holy Headshot! is an amazing collection of the funniest, strangest, most captivating performers' headshots and resumes you have ever seen. The book throws open the door to the casting director's office and gives an entertaining peek into the amazing -- and sometimes bizarre -- world of show business. Authors Patrick Borelli and Douglas Gorenstein pored over 50,000 headshots to put together this remarkable gallery, which showcases everyone from aspiring amateurs who are striving to live out their Hollywood dreams to seasoned professionals that you might recognize from the big screen. A celebration of our national obsession with getting famous, Holy Headshot! offers up plenty of "What were they thinking!?" hilarity, but just as often you'll find yourself rooting for the characters that populate its pages.


The Republican Playbook

Filename: the-republican-playbook.pdf
ISBN: 1401302904
Release Date: 2006-09-27
Number of pages: 160
Author: Andy Borowitz
Publisher: Hyperion

Download and read online The Republican Playbook in PDF and EPUB A tongue-in-cheek Republican guide to political schemes, scams, and dirty tricks, featuring detailed instructions on how to run a proper smear campaign, how to cover up a leak, and how to install voting booth/ballot shredders.


Little Failure

Filename: little-failure.pdf
ISBN: 9780241968352
Release Date: 2014-02-27
Number of pages: 384
Author: Gary Shteyngart
Publisher: Penguin UK

Download and read online Little Failure in PDF and EPUB Little Failure is an autobiography of comic genius by the hilarious Gary Shteyngart. Little Failure - its title the same as the alarming pet-name given to the young Gary Shteyngart by his father when growing up in pre-Glasnost Russia - is one of the most remarkable immigrant memoirs ever written. A candid and deeply poignant story of a Soviet family's trials and tribulations, and of their escape in 1979 to the consumerist promised land of the USA, it is also an exceptionally funny account of the author's transformation from asthmatic toddler in Red Square to 40-something Manhattanite with a receding hairline and a memoir to write. 'Kicks ass - more fantastic, more unbelievable than his novels' Mary Karr, author of The Liars' Club 'A marvel of a story. His finest book yet' Zadie Smith 'Little Failure is a delight' Aravid Adiga Gary Shteyngart was born in Leningrad in 1972. In 2007 he was named one of Granta's Best Young American novelists. His debut The Russian Debutante's Handbook was widely acclaimed (and won the National Jewish Book Award for Fiction), as were his second, Absurdistan (one of the 10 Best Books of the Year in the New York Times) and Super Sad True Love Story. He writes regularly for the New Yorker.


Cheney s War Crimes

Filename: cheney-s-war-crimes.pdf
ISBN: 9781477274675
Release Date: 2013-02-07
Number of pages: 228
Author: Holcomb B. Noble
Publisher: Author House

Download and read online Cheney s War Crimes in PDF and EPUB In an important sense, Holcomb Noble spent most of his career at The New York Times preparing for this project, the first ten years as an acquisitions editor and rewrite person at the Sunday magazine. After stints as a science-section editor, metropolitan news editor, and business editor, he was made an investigations editor, during which he led two teams in year-long investigations that won back-to-back Pulitzer Prizes—one proving that the Star Wars anti-missile shield would not work, saving the nation an estimated cost of more than a trillion dollars, and the second uncovering corruption in the space industry, which directly accounted for the crash of the space shuttle Challenger and death of seven astronauts. His journalism career began as a reporter for the Worcester Telegram in Massachusetts after graduation from Amherst College. He joined the Associated Press in 1960 and went on to become day supervising editor of the AP’s general news report. Part of his responsibilities included directing coverage of the moon missions of Apollo 12, 13, and 14 from the AP bureau at the space center in Houston. Cheney’s War Crimes brings together for the first time the many strands of the Shakespearean tragedy that is the story of Dick Cheney. It gives an insider’s account of his extraordinary seizure of power in becoming the de facto president; makes shocking disclosures about the chaos and confusion in response to the 9/11 attacks; and tells step by step how Cheney led the nation into two destructive wars in the Middle East.


Working the Angles

Filename: working-the-angles.pdf
ISBN: 0802802656
Release Date: 1987
Number of pages: 137
Author: Eugene H. Peterson
Publisher: Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing

Download and read online Working the Angles in PDF and EPUB Asks clergy to return to the fundamental basics and focus on praying, reading scripture, and giving spiritual direction instead of image, attendance numbers, sociological impact, and economic viability.


The Jewish Moral Virtues

Filename: the-jewish-moral-virtues.pdf
ISBN: 0827606648
Release Date: 1999
Number of pages: 360
Author: Eugene B. Borowitz
Publisher: Jewish Publication Society

Download and read online The Jewish Moral Virtues in PDF and EPUB The Jewish Moral Virtues is a book of musar - practical ethical wisdom applied to contemporary life. In form and purpose, it is parallel to William Bennett's bestselling Book of Virtues. Authors Borowitz and Schwartz synthesize traditional scholarship from a wide range of Jewish sources with personal insights into modern ethical dilemmas. Traditionally, Jewish ethical teachers have been concerned with law or general guidance for a good life, i.e., virtue, rather than philosophical meditations upon specific issues. This collection is structured upon the twenty-four virtues selected by a thirteenth-century Roman Jew, Yehiel ben Yekutiel, including trustworthiness, lovingkindness, compassion, generosity, charity, humility, and pure-heartedness, among others, and expands to include wisdom from the ancient rabbis, medieval philosophers, and Yehiel's successors over the past seven centuries.


Committed

Filename: committed.pdf
ISBN: 9781596910263
Release Date: 2006-01-24
Number of pages: 256
Author: Chris Knutsen
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing USA

Download and read online Committed in PDF and EPUB Men who have strayed and men who have stayed faithful contribute to a unique and personal collection of stories and essays examining what it means to be faithful to a relationship and a marriage in the modern world. Reprint. 40,000 first printing.


Fried Convicted

Filename: fried-convicted.pdf
ISBN: 9781612940946
Release Date: 2017-03-20
Number of pages: 250
Author: Fay Jacobs
Publisher: Bywater Books

Download and read online Fried Convicted in PDF and EPUB As the author of four humorous memoirs, activist and comedian Fay Jacobs returns with her newest tall tales, Fried & Convicted, Rehoboth Beach Uncorked. And, as you’d expect, It’s chock-full of Fay’s signature witty, wise, and often laugh-out-loud commentary about the craziness of contemporary life in the diverse and welcoming resort town of Rehoboth Beach on the Delaware Coast. This time, though, everyone’s favorite “Sit-Down Comic” grapples with the insanity of a high-tech bra, cartoon bladders in prescription advertising, and refusing to act her age . . . Fried & Convicted was written over the last few years and culminates with Election Day, 2016. It chronicles the joy of gaining equal marriage rights for same-sex couples, tales of Icelandic lagoons, Provincetown adventures, and much ado about lesbians of a certain age. It tells a few harrowing personal stories, such as Bonnie’s unnerving medical diagnosis, the time Fay went kayaking with alligators, and how she came up with a public relations scheme to rescue her pal’s purloined pooch. And through it all, she finds a way to make it provocative, political, occasionally heartwarming, and reliably hilarious. Featuring Fay’s latest magazine columns plus new, never before published material, Fried & Convicted is a pleasure for longtime fans and new readers alike. Come along for the ride—you’ll be happy you did! Fay Jacobs spent thirty years in Washington, DC working in journalism and public relations. Her latest project is a one-woman show, Aging Gracelessly: 50 Shades of Fay, which is being performed in theatres around the country. She lives in Rehoboth Beach with her wife of thirty-four years and a Miniature Schnauzer.